The Futility of Cynicism or Think Happy Thoughts!

You may want to take a seat, because I'm about to reveal a deep, dark, shocking secret. Are you ready? Here goes:

I'm a cynic. I'm probably one of the most cynical bastards you'll ever meet.

"But wait," some of you are probably muttering, "That makes no sense! How could Darren, who is one of the most handsome, intelligent, and humble human beings I know be a cynic?!! It's impossible!!"

"Madness!!"

I know it must come as a shock, but I'm afraid it's true. It's an affliction I've been dealing with for more years than I can remember. Sometimes, it wins the battle for my peace of mind, and I transform into a moody, cantankerous shell of a man; dementors would drop by for a snack, and then leave in a huff when they discovered that I was one of them. This state of being could last for days or weeks at a time, and then I gradually beat the zombie horde of negative thoughts back for a time, and I return to my lovable self.

For a long time, I actually took pride in my cynicism; I was being "realistic," looking at the world square in the face and saying "I see through all the bullshit, world. You suck!"
The world, for whatever reason, never responded to my criticisms.
And so, being the realistic person I was, I would go about my day, scoffing at the people who dared be optimistic about life, who had the nerve, the gall, to be happy! How dare they?!

For a long time, I hated those people.

It took a while, but I've finally moved past that kind of thinking. Oh, I'm still cynical; a lifetime of being ill-tempered can't be shaken off that easily. But I have made a startling transition in my thought process. It was something I just noticed today, in fact. I discovered that I'm no longer proud of my hard-earned cynicism. In fact, I hate it.

I know, right? It only took me thirty years to grow up a little.

I also realized that all those happy-crappy optimists that I loathed for such a long time weren't a source of ire. They were a source of envy. I envied them their happiness, they're smiles, and their light-hearted laughter. 

I've become cognizant of the fact that cynicism is ultimately futile. It's a lot like candy; it feels hella good to be nomming down on some sweetly bitter thoughts, but all you get in the end is cavities of the soul, as well as a fat ass and a sugar gut. It's a drain on your energy, your health, and your personal happiness. It restricts who you can become and what you can do with your day. In fact, it pretty much limits you in every aspect of life. Someone (I don't know who) once told me that the only difference between the successful and everyone else is cynicism; those who are truly successful in what they do, be it careers, relationships, or hobbies all have that one thing in common with each other: they aren't cynics.

There are no successful cynics.

Now, since I don't want to spend the rest of my days as an unhappy sack of crap, I've decided to turn over a new leaf, and think happy thoughts.

I'll just let the magnitude of that statement sink in.

Happy Independence Day, ya'll!!